(a conversational post-mortem for founders who’d rather not star in one)

First, a reality check (a.k.a. “the odds are still brutal”)

• Roughly 65 % of new U.S. startups are gone by Year 10—and almost 1 in 5 never celebrate a first birthday. Exploding Topics
• CB Insights has logged 483 founder post-mortems and counting; the same classic mistakes keep popping up. CB Insights

Now, let’s talk about those mistakes in plain English—no MBA jargon, just real stories.

1. Cash Bonfire: “Burn-Baby-Burn” (Beepi)

Start → Raise → Hype^10 → Burn^100 → Garage Sale

Remember Beepi, the used-car marketplace that cruised to a $525 million valuation in two years? Turns out a SoMa penthouse office, $7 million-a-month burn and “why-not-buy-the-$10k-sofa?” vibes aren’t sustainable. When funding cooled, the company was literally sold for parts to repay investors. TechCrunchDigital Data Design Institute at Harvard

2025 takeaway: Track your true unit economics weekly. If every transaction bleeds red ink, growth is just scaling the hemorrhage.

2. Crowdfund Coma: “Lots of Backers ≠ Product-Market Fit” (Hello Sense)

Kickstarter roar → $40 M VC → Orb on your nightstand → Zzz…

Hello’s orb-shaped sleep tracker smashed Kickstarter records and hit a $250–$300 M valuation. What it didn’t hit? Daily-use habit loops. Reviews were lukewarm, feature road-map stalled, and acquisition talks with Fitbit fizzled; the company pulled the plug in 2017. TechCrunchBBC

2025 takeaway: Retention, not pre-orders, is king. If week-8 engagement tanks, fix the core loop before the next hype cycle.

3. Timing the Money Tap: “Too Late, You’re Toast” (Table8)

Great restaurants, $20 VIP tables, $4.6 M seed… then crickets

Table8 offered coveted dinner slots at peak hours. Cool concept—but capital ran dry before the model could outrun customer-acquisition costs. With no bridge round, the doors closed. The Business Journals

2025 takeaway: Raise for 12–18 months of runway before the bank balance flashes red. Fundraising during a liquidity crunch is like asking for a loan at a going-out-of-business sale.

4. Single-Whale Syndrome: “Client Concentration Kills” (AudienceScience)

One massive client (P&G) → client walks → lights out in <30 days

AudienceScience bet its future on one blue-chip advertiser. When P&G switched vendors, revenue evaporated and the ad-tech firm folded almost overnight. AdExchanger

2025 takeaway: Cap any one customer at ~25 % of revenue. If you must serve whales, build a pod of them.

5. Mis-Matched Capital & Governance Drama: “Choose Your Backers Wisely” (Guvera)

$185 M raised → lavish “House of Guvera” launches → ASX blocks IPO → collapse

Australian streamer Guvera burned through nine-figure funds on licensing fees, pricey events and related-party deals. When the stock exchange refused its IPO, the cash cliff arrived and founders exited pointing fingers. ABCAustralian Financial Review

2025 takeaway: Beyond the check size, vet investors for governance chops and realistic growth expectations. Fancy launch parties don’t pay music-label invoices.

Quick-fire Survival Cheat Sheet

1. Know your burn—Run a 24-month cash-flow model, not a 3-month fantasy.
   
2. Validate retention early—Week-4 or bust.
   
3. Raise ahead of the curve—Start conversations six months before runway-zero.
   
4. Diversify revenue—No one client should dictate your all-hands agenda.
   
5. Align with grown-ups—Smart money + transparent board beats “spray-and-pray” cash every time.
   

TL;DR

Hype is cheap, discipline is priceless. Nail the fundamentals—sane burn, sticky users, timely capital, diversified revenue, and straight-shooting governance—and you’ll dodge most of the tombstones above.